Exactly a year ago, on Valentine’s Day, I was boarding a plane from Doha to Beirut; leaving Mumma and going back to school. Exactly a year ago, I celebrated Valentine’s Day with my close girlfriends by posting an Instagram video raising awareness on Women Abuse.
This Valentine’s, one year later, I am here- posting on Shour.
Each year on the 14/02 I take the time to look back at my accomplishments, the people I am blessed with, the beautiful life I live and all the mistakes I’ve moved past from. For me this day is not about showing off expensive gift, cheesy (yes, sorry) red roses, or nag about how single I am - well, I’m guilty of that sometimes- but about making sure everyone I love knows that I do, about loving myself, and encouraging people to love themselves too.
People want to be 100% immersed in stable relationships, unrealistic love lives, Instagram goals.. Some humans lose their individuality and authenticity in this process. Some are so taken in this relationship or friendship or even in family affairs that they tend to neglect themselves. They then go around pouring their soul into everything and everyone or in that thing or the one, ending up empty - completely empty.
I do that too: I make extra effort for people around me, the people I love, the things I am so passionate about, or just to please or help somebody else. I become so taken by everything but myself, my health and my comfort. I spent so many nights crying because I felt so let down by a person who didn’t reciprocate half my energy or by a project I wanted to succeed in so badly but cannot get and I am sure most of you guys relate to that too. It’s so gut wrenching to get screwed like that.
Though I am lucky, lucky because of two things (mainly): Firstly, because I am always able to remind myself that I am a priority no matter what, taking the time every while to fully focus on myself and what I need to get done and secondly because I have a rock-solid, unwavering support system that constantly reminds me of my self worth, of the good things in life and what I did to get where I am today yet always - and when I tell you always I mean it- keeps me humbled. For that you guys, I am eternally grateful even if I don’t feel like it all the time.
Through the platform I’ve been blessed with, I aspire to give the people who vibe with me the same radiant, powerful and beautiful energy I get. Through my very humble platform I aspire to maybe help someone fall inlove with themselves, with the universe, maybe with just a tshirt, I don’t know.
Whether male or female, I want you - whoever you are- to love yourself, to embrace yourself and proceed from there. Before giving love to anybody or anything else, give it to yourself in fucking bucketloads. You’ve got stretchmarks? You look freaking fabulous. You are afraid of showing your emotions? Go ahead buddy, feel everything, you cannot feel the same things twice- make use of the experience. You are failing in school? Fuck this shit, you can do it. You want to shave your head but are afraid of whatever it is? Go off baby, shave it. You got this. It is your life to live. You are being abused one way or another? Get the fuck out of there. And if you’re afraid that there ain’t anyone to back you up, I am here for you.
Regardless of what you are horrified of doing, of feeling or what you detest about yourself, you can do it and you will. Things come slowly but you gotta work for every piece of it. You gotta build up the courage, grab life by the balls, ride it. Today and ever day is your day. Your day to make it better, to achieve more, to be happy and feel and give love. Be nice. Help someone out. Give this world good energy. Everyone deserves some.
To all my peeps celebrating V-day, I hope y’all have a wonderful one. And to the people suffering, it’s cheesy and I know you don’t wanna hear that, but this shit don’t last. I’m talking out of personal experience: things come and go. You just need to stick by YOUR side.
To my mumma, aunties, Teta - the most amazing women in my life- I want to take a minute and thank you so very much. To my dad, my three uncles who are not just that but fathers to me too, I love you!
Lea Accari and Sarah Bassim you guys and your family have been my backbone for so long, I can never thank you or love you enough for everything.
Jana Dernaika, without you my last two years wouldn’t have passed as smoothly as they did, without you I wouldn’t have gotten through all of what I did, and without you all of this would’ve been nonexistent.
To all the people who surround me with laughter, love, encouragement, high hopes and make my days way more marvelous: Y’all I’m so inlove with you. To all the riders who have stuck with me all through my journey, be it my blog, personal issues, school or anything else: I don’t know what I would’ve done without you, honestly.
Last but not least, I want to send Mamma Earth, my country, all its martyrs and its people incredible amounts of love, admiration and respect. Without you there is no me. Or any of us. I’m feeling so much love today guys. I hope y’all are too.
Je vous adore! Kimberly